Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Cat time

I have an insatiable desire to title every post I write


This desire also arrises when I am on the blue and white land of Facebook.

It's all I think of when I see that little box.

WHAT'S NEW PUSSYCAT?  And I sing it in my head when I imagine writing it.

And speaking of cats and what's new with them.....

Olivia bit my hand quite hard this past weekend.  I am now ready to talk about it (unless you saw me in person and I put my hand in your face immediately and started telling the traumatic story)  But like my Dad always told me, when you have a great cat story in the palm of your hands you must tell the world.  The world.  And the world wide web. 

I was brushing Olivia on Saturday morning.  The sun was filtering through the window and we were sipping our coffee about to start our day.  

Olivia looked like she need a good brushin'.  So I grabbed my hair comb (we share, and it's okay to judge me.  I was also once caught bathing with Olivia by a roomate who shall remain nameless.)  In normal cat fashion she was all into it.  Her butt was in the air and she was lovin' some brushin'.  

Then a cold wind swept through the room.  A cloud rolled over the bright sun and darkness fell upon us.  Olivia got that look in her eyes.  That look that says, "I'm 'bout to EAT YO HAND MOTHER *&*(&.  ( I apologize for her vulgar mouth.  But that was the human translation to her facial expression)

I put my feet up in the chair an assumed position.  We've been down this road before a time or two.  Andrew stood by murmuring the school yard "ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh.  you're gonna get ittttttttttt".

No way.  Baby cat loves me fool.  

But little did I know that baby cat had transformed into KILLER cat.  

I mistakenly put my hand back down in front of her.  The killer claws came out and latched to my hand.  Her saber tooth teeth sunk into my hand.  

This was the bloody Sunday (er Saturday) aftermath.  

 I know.  It's hard to look at.  

Andrew went after Olivia with a small wooden American Flag.  Don't tread on us. 

She stood eating her food in her bowl and did not move and inch or stop eating while Andrew gave her a good whack.  Cat has some meat on her bones. 

As her mother, I instantly forgave my child and blamed it on her feral upbringing before I took over. 

Then I started to swell up.  

 And I ended up getting meds at Rite Aid for my animal attack bite. 

We are all on the path to healing, one day at a time.

And that's what's new pussycat. 


PJH said...

You crack me up. Don't tread on us!

Amber said...

The Don't Tread on Us had me giggling, too. This was a laugh out loud laffer.

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