Monday, May 31, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
I love coming to Roanoke. I nestle up in my friends Mickey's treehouse (it's not really a treehouse, but it feels like one) time disappears, and we play music all day long.
I'm in the star city for the Festival in the Park. Woo hoo! A festival! I've never played at a festival. Will it be any different? Will it be hot? Will people dance? Will people boo? OHHH the suspense.
Last night, I somehow ended up in mmmmm...one of the most beautiful houses I have ever stepped foot in, & sang a song for a group of Mickey's friends playing a game of poker. It was one of those....how did I end up here kind of moments? Those seem to be happening to me a lot lately. Just a day in the life.
I'm off to eat some dinner & play some more music! I should have some new recordings to post, so I'm really excited about that.
Happy Memorial Day Weekend Folks! (don't drink & drive)
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
We brought some horses over for our ferrier to shoe. I overheard the firefighters behind me asking the first graders,
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
He looked like someone had taken a pee in his cherrios this morning, so I didn't get too close.
I made turkey & cheddar panini's for lunch for the farm workers (andrew & his mom...and me!).
The best part of working days at the farm is nap time. Everyone pretty much grabs a 20-30 minute power nap in the afternoon and this rain shower that just started down is going to make it pretty easy to relax right now.
:) happy tuesday.
Monday, May 24, 2010
we took a hike this afternoon and my darn camera died.
i'll make sure and charge my camera next time. the mountains are to pretty for words right now.
You know that question that makes every unemployed persons skin raise while instantly making you want to slink away?
"What do you do?"
I wish we could just ban that phrase. It leads to all sorts of feelings of inadequacies. I used to love answering it, when I loved my old job at CFF. I was really really proud of my job and I welcomed the question.
I've been asked that question lately, you know....since I currently don't have a job. And I have all kinds of answers in reserve . But, I think what's been bothering me is that I'm not being truthful.
What am I doing?
I'm playing music. It's what I want to do & something that I have wanted to do "full time" my entire life. No, I don't have a reserve of money backing me up. But I do have a reserve of people that love me backing me up.
This may just be one of the scariest things I have ever done. But I know it's the only thing I want to do.
My friend Amy told me once, "Just jump. The net will catch you." And, ya know what? It will. And I will just keep figuring out things as I go & throw security out of the window.
So my new goal this week is to be honest with myself. What do I do? I play music & sing. I might have a job here and there to make some extra cash but I DO music. It's what I love and I'm going after it with all my heart.
Happy Monday. :)
(I promise I'm coming off of my "eat, pray, love" mission soon. So much on my mind. I will get back to microsoft paint & fun stories asap)
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
I have had an epiphany. And I definitely had to look up how to spell epiphany.
Everyone and their brother who knows me knows I have all these stomach issues. And GERD is still butting it's ugly head into my life. I realize I'm going to have to control my diet the rest of my life BUT what I didn't realize was that I would have to learn how to breathe again.
Last week, on my "eat, pray, love" tour of SW Virginia, I took a drive down to Kingsport, TN to visit my dear friend Allison to do some energy work & massage on me. I asked her to focus on my stomach.
Have you ever had anyone massage your stomach? It's a little weird at first but it also feels very comforting to have someone work on your belly. It's an area of your body that holds so much energy and emotions. Allison told me that she could tell I wasn't taking full deep breathes and that she could tell my stomach was a little irritated from my diaphragm.
So afterwards, I went home feeling very relaxed but still the same. I ended up having a....let's just call it a "discussion" with someone really close to me, and it brought up a ton of old memories, some not so bright, & there was just this flood of negative emotions that came out of me. I felt drained. I felt completely drained.
I drove back to the farm with a lot on my mind. Everything was resolved as much as it was going to be, but it was a very exhausting experience. And I noticed that my stomach was really sore. Not inside sore like I am used to, but sore on the outside. I figured it was from the massage and went on with life.
A few nights later I still had a sore stomach. I could actually see that my stomach was a little swollen. I sat there in bed and studied myself. I studied my breath and my stomach and their connection. It almost scared me when I realized what Allison was talking about. I could literally feel myself taking a breath, holding it and grinding it into my stomach. I don't know if that makes sense but that's the way it feels. Then I observed myself the next day. It happened all of the time. I would catch myself just holding my breath and putting that pressure on my stomach. This especially happened when I felt any slight anxiety or anger. I would push it into my stomach.
I called Allison in a panic. "My stomach is sore, I can SEE IT from the outside, and I'm not breathing right...and I just figured it out...and it's freaking me out..um...call me back?"
Allison gave me the reassuring call that I knew she would and told me to continue to work on it. Work on observing breathe & correcting it by taking a few full, deep breathes to correct.
So, that's where I am starting. Learning to breathe again. Take a minute and observe yourself. Even if you do your yoga/pilates twice a day & you think you've got this breathing thing down, sit with yourself and learn how to breathe again.
I've been feeling like I'm starting over in alot of ways lately, so this is pretty fitting. Just breathe.
Monday, May 17, 2010
And this is Grandma- A.K.A Lady. She is the 30 + year old mare that wanders around the farm, doing as she pleases. It's only now becoming normal to look outside the window and see a horse grazing on the front yard.
I'm off to practice for awhile. Got lot's of music on my mind. :)
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Last week, Mickey & I sang in the Mockingbird's All Star Open Mic Night.
aaaaannnnd we won!! It was a pretty wild ride of emotions. I totally thought that the lost Jonas brother & his band were going to sweep the competition.
Needless to say, I held a HUGE cheese smile on my face the rest of the night. It was stuck for at least 48 hours.
I had the best friends come and support me (thanks guys!) and the entire night is engrained in my mind as one of the best times I have had here in the Valley to date. :)
Thursday, May 13, 2010
My bum hurts a tad but I am really excited about learning how to ride.
I drew a picture on microsoft paint of where I was hurting, but it just didn't turn out quite appropriate. Maybe one night I will expose some of my XXX microsoft paintings.
Olivia also came up to the barn to visit. (see above night-vision-ish pics from my phone camera). She is still warming up to the horses but she definitely did not warm up to Tarzan.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
I quit my part time job on Saturday, left town for Norton & just got back from my hiatus today. I feel like I am in the poor, go find yourself in SW Virginia version of "Eat, Pray, Love".
I think I have a plan....I do. That is think. I think?
Oh let's just all hop on my crazy train and go for a ride? Shall we?
Now I'm going to go and recite the serenity prayer a few more times.